Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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