I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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