well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
