Whod you bang
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
organizing the empties. That sober.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
