I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
