She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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