there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize