ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
There are leaves in my underwear?
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