Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.

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(308): View more from Nebraska

i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.

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(254): View more from Texas

that's what penises do

(254): View more from Texas

they tell lies.

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(806): View more from Texas

What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???

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(410): View more from Maryland

And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..

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(+61): View more from Australia

MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING

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(707): View more from California

THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.

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