If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
