A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I don't think brook has ever known best
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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