the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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