So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
