so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
