that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Randomize