I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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