just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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