my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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