ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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