What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
