TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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