I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
