Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Randomize
