just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
