i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize