I murdered the dance floor call the cops
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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