Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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