I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize