Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize
