The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize