Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize