I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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