Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
