what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
