i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize