Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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