It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
