But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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