We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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