How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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