The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.