They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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