id be glad to
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
