It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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