I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize