It's Friday. Sex?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize