my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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