Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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