i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
