I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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