left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize