Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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